I have been having a tough week this week. i am still in pain. my dad told me he wanted me to keep faith and have my little cousin over tonight so that he and mom can bring them to see santa tomorrow. i really want to go but I dont want to spoil everything for them because I am not feeling well so I am thinking ill probably just stay home and be by myself yet for another day. Having this pain makes me so tired. I dont really know how to ecplain it really. Right now i am kind of at teh point that i wish I could give it to a few people just so they know how i feel every time I have my female issue. I dread it I get angry because i know what is comming. i dont want to feel like this every six weeks and soon it may be back to every month depending on how long the ring is effective for me I have not had very good luck with BCP's and it is basically a birth control pill in a ring form it has the same stuff in it so we shall see
Well any how this morning i was kind of bummed because I was not going to be able to talke a nap and rest and i told my mom that it was going to be a hard day and she said she figured it would be but then another family member was like we all have pain just deal with it. If anyone knows that we all have pain its me um I have had this for ten years now and I know I should be used to it but i dont think that ever happens.
I am getting scared that it is going to come back and be at the same point it was before i had surgery or lupron. It is not fun to be afraid of the pain comming. It changes so quickly last time I had the pain I got through it with no pain medication at all this time i am on ibuprophen and tylenol so I cant help but think wow what is the next time gonna be like. This is a horible condition and it is still managing to take ten days or more from me every time it decides to act up yes it is bette rthan all month long but still it is tough. I know I am complaining and maybe I dont deserve to complain but I feel that very few people really care to hear me. I dont know I am really just very confused and feeling kind of like the lupron and the surgery were not really as effective as we had hoped well i guess that is about all for today
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