Well I am still stuck in the pattern of being sick but I was able to have fun yesterday with the kids. I am glad too they keep me going for sure. The only reason that I was able to do stuff with them though is because I only had a scrambled egg in the morning then dinner. I felt really bad after dinner again. any ways we made scare crows for halloween it was fun filling them with leaves. I think I had more fun watching two six year old gorls burrowing through the leaces like ground hogs but thats ok too they had fun and i was laughing. I miss being able to be myself I just want to be able to be free and not have to wonder when I am going to need meds for neasua and vomiting not so much pain any more. I have just been crying through it. I hate the way they make me feel and no matter what it takes I am determined I am not going to live in pain forever and it will be without medication. I do not have to be bound to pain like the other doc said and i will not take that as a satisfying answer. I dont have to and i will not. yes here is my attitude comming back out but I gotta have it in order to get through each and every day. It is an internal attitude I dont try to give it to my parents or relatives but sometiems they do get it lol.
I am not so sure that I anm really ready to attack the gluten fre diet. i will be doing this alll on my own as no one is willing to make the change with me. It is so hard to think about right now. I want the labs to show somethng but then again do I really. I will be more issolated from people than i already am. This isolation will be in my own home though that I am not used to. I don't know what to do if it omes down to me needing this diest. I am afraid I know that my fmily will suport me with it and get me the things i need but as far as having someone be going through it with me nope probably not as no one else has any of the symptoms like i do so confused still and have over a week to wait to see the results of the labs so we shall see next tuesday or so the begining of november as next sunday is the end of october cat wait for halloween i am gonna try going out with my niece and nephew to get myself some needed excercise but it depends on how I am feeling
Glad you're having some fun and really glad to hear about your attitude! You deserve to be pain free no matter what it takes so keep up the fight. The diet is a hard one, it's a big change. Maybe you shouldn't stress about it yet. Wait until the labs come back and you know for sure. No need for one more thing to worry about! Hang in there!
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